Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Jump off the rat race

My dream goes like this that I am running very hard and am at the same place. I always open my eyes to find my dream is true as I am clocking away miles on the treadmill.  It is the ultimate rat race. If you stop you fall off. 

I tried getting off the rat race. Unfortunately the method I chose went awry. I bought Satyam Shares in 16 tranches. I own so much of it that I got a call from my CA who helps me to do tax returns. He wants to make sure that I have enough money in the bank to cover his fees this time over. A mere bank statement will not suffice now. He wants to go to the bank and physically count the money they have in my account. My title of the book has changed to Intelligent Loser. At least the second part of the title is true.

In order to get out of dire straits, a well wisher advised me to moon light in to advertising. I think it is a great idea, but for my extrapolated thinking. I keep extrapolating ads in to future.

Pappu pass ho goya. He marries, has kid(s) unless he has the condom ringtone on his phones. The ring tone is a great tool which would keep every body around celibate.  Pappu then jumps in joy and distributes chocolates when the telemarketer tells him that he is the chosen one for the new credit card.

Sar utha ke jiyo. The protagonist does exactly that and bumps his head on a low ceiling. He then goes ahead and buys shares in Satyam.

Hungry kya. The hero only eats in Mac and develops plaques in coronary artery. As he is not a VIP, he admits himself in to a normal hospital and utters the magic words " I have insurance". Hospital then does a very fast bypass and gives a bill which bankrupts the insurance company. It also compels the hero to apply for the job which says earn Rs. 50,000 by doing web search.

So folks, if you want anybody to extend an advertisement to a full length hindi movie lasting longer than Jodha Akbar then I can surely take it up.  For extra money I will even walk the red carpet with Ashutosh G.

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